THREE LITTLE THINGS
James 1:19
"Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry"
My great friend, Col Jim Newbill, told me a story about a turkey hunt many years ago. Jim told me a gobbler he had been hunting for several days was finally working his way into Jim's calling. He slowly made his way down the logging road through the hardwoods. After several minutes he was in range but in full strut and his head was tucked back into the feathers standing up on his chest.
Very seasoned turkey hunter know that it's a tough shot as so much of his kill zone is covered by feathers. Jim made a few soft calls hoping that the gobbler would lift his head... but he just kept dancing around in full strut, trying to impress the hen he thought he heard, but were in fact Jim's calls. Finally out of frustration, Jim let out a sharp whistle to get him to raise his head. At the sound of the whistle the gobbler took off flying, spooked by the strange sound. As he launched off the ground Jim took a hurried shot, but it was a clean miss. Jim said he would never do that again.
How often in life have we said something that we regret later? It may have been something that was perfectly innocent, but someone heard it and took it wrong and they turned and walked away, upset or hurt. This happens all too often and many relationships are destroyed by the wrong words and not listening carefully.
There are three instructions in James 1:19; be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry... seems simple enough. But how many of us live this out? How many of us really want to listen carefully to someone else's opinion before we give our own? If we watch the news and see when they have two guests with differing opinions, rarely does one get done with a sentence before the other jumps in over them in the conversation. Before long tempers are high and they are both angry. Why? Because both are talking, neither are listening and both have become angry.
The three instructions that James gave show up all too often when we do the opposite of what he suggests. When we're quick to speak, Small issues turn into BIG problems. When we're slow to listen we don't truly hear the other person and miscommunication turns into an argument. When we're quick to become angry, because of the miscommunication, we become bitter and our relationships are often destroyed.
There's a saying that says that we too often listen to respond instead of listening to understand. We start preparing our response when the other person is only half way through what they are saying. When we give our response the other person in the conversation is offended because you didn't listen to what they really said... and so it goes downhill quickly.
I've heard it said that, "God gave us two ears and only one mouth, so we should listen twice as much as we speak". I would change that, I believe we should listen three times as much. If we just first listen with our ears (we just hear the words), then listen with our minds (think about what was said), then listen with our heart (allow God to give you the understanding of what was said). It's after this that we can give a godly response. If we stop that process at the ears or mind our response will be from our own thoughts and not those of God.
Learning to follow the three steps in James 1:19 is a tough thing to do. It means giving up our own selfish desires and allowing others to win sometimes. But as life goes on the blessings that come from those three short thoughts will change our lives.
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